Elevator Etiquette

Being on the 10th floor of my building, i require the elevator to move vertically from my unit to the ground floor and back. I'd say that's a reasonable amount of floors to rely on an elevator, don't you?

There are, however, two or three people in my condo who seem to have a different criteria than me. On several occassions, i have been leaving home and heading down on the elevator when you feel the car come to a stop. Since i live in a fairly small building, the elevator rarely stops to pick anyone up on the way, so i always assume i'm on the ground floor (it stinks of effort to actually look up at the display that tells you what floor you're on).

But no, i haven't arrived at the ground floor. The elevator has stopped to pick someone up...on the second floor.

This, my friends, breaks the rules of elevator etiquette. When that door opens on the second floor, you better be missing some legs. Or be four hundred years old. Or be moving a heavy wooden coffin.

Are you telling me you'll come out of your unit, push the button and wait for an elevator when you could walk down one flight of stairs in half the time?

Boy do i ever want to send out some stink eye when i see these lazy bastards walk into that elevator. What i think is happening is that people, like me, are paying condo fees, and figure that they want to take full advantage of the amenities those fees cover, like elevator rides. Yippee!

And on a related note, just the other day i was getting on the elevator on the first floor, and a guy was already in there, holding the door open for me, which i thanked him for. He then asked me what floor, as he was by the panel with the buttons you select. I told him "10, please". Just then, another person came into the elevator, as he was still holding the door. I noticed she did not thank him for holding the door for her, and when he asked her what floor she would like, she just said "4".

No please. No thank you. No nothing.

This irritated me. But i said nothing. After all, it wasn't me who was doing all the hard work of holding doors and playing the role of elevator operator.

But after she got off on the 4th floor, I couldn't hold back. I said to the guy: "Nice of her to say please and thank you huh?" He just smiled and said "I know, I know."

And as he got off on his floor, he said "But I appreciate you saying it".

So i punched him in the mouth.

No no. Here was a thoughtful, conscientous person who, in the face of a selfish, ignorant jackass, still took the high road. I'm not sure if i would have said anything to the woman if it was me doing all the button pushing. Probably not in this instance, but i'm never quite sure about those situations until they actually happen. Some might say.."what's the point" in saying something and being confrontational.

There is some validity to that, but to me, I feel like I need to teach people some manners so next time, they will say please and thank you, and things will be less unpleasant. And the birds will sing. And the sun will shine. And we won't beat seals with clubs anymore. And, for god's sake, maybe just maybe, we can have one goddamn sports team in this city that doesn't suck ass!